Notable Scholars. Literature and Notable Works. Profession of faith Prayer Fasting Alms-giving Pilgrimage. Texts and sciences. Culture and society. Related topics. Archived from the original on Retrieved John Witte, Jr. Religion, marriage, and family series. Grand Rapids, Michigan : William B.
Part 1: The Duties of Women
Eerdmans Publishing Company , He's absolutely right; I absolutely agree. And you stand on the sidelines and see the havoc divorce wreaks on kids, and you want to wring these people's scrawny necks. But the couples know that, and it tears them apart. I have never seen a man or a woman who wasn't totally traumatized by divorce.
This law is just a way of punishing them. Let's try something other than hellfire and brimstone. For all its conservative associations, it's not certain that the Louisiana statute serves an idea of marriage that conservatives will want to claim as their own. Even the most ardent family value advocates have seldom cited insufficient state policing as the primary cause of the current rotten record of marital permanence.
Back when marriage was well policed, it was policed--and not always prettily--by gossips and priests and violent older brothers. Today, that kind of minding of other people's business has not only been discredited but even been made illegal. The first employer who decides he wants only covenant marrieds working in his plant will wind up on the losing end of a Supreme Court decision.
Whether the work of constructive bullying, or tough love, can be done by a bunch of counselors and bureaucrats in some Department of Happy Marriages in the state capital miles away is open to question. In the meantime, what Perkins and his allies have served up is a heady Clintonite cocktail, composed in equal parts of minor legislation, the rhetoric of choice, education or counseling as a pain-free means to social improvement, the protection of children as a first imperative, and all of it based on a proposition--that marriage is an institution that's worth defending--with which no one could possibly disagree.
The result is a reversal of roles that ought to be heartening to the GOP. For once, it's Republicans who are arguing on behalf of "commonsense" solutions for those who work hard and play by the rules. Democrats, meanwhile, resort to abstract, destroy-the-Department-of-Education-style libertarianism of the sort that has proved a consistent loser in the politics of the last three years.
No matter what the outcome, something very significant has happened in Louisiana: the first Republican defeat of Clintonism on Clintonite turf. Reprinted from the Weekly Standard , September 29, A woman in this situation has a great responsibility. The slightest mishandling of the situation, through carelessness. May shatter their family life. This is a situation where the wisdom and cleverness of some women can become useful and apparent.
One should remember that rows or arguments are not the solution and they may result in the exact opposite. A woman, who experiences this event, has two tasks to achieve:. She must find out the reason for her husband's behavior. She should fairly judge why he has grown cold towards his family and gone astray. She may find that her own attitude had been the cause; or perhaps she had been the cause; or perhaps she had been indifferent to his desires for food, her looks or the affairs of the house.
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Such matters draw men away from home. They may then pursue outside deviant activities in order to forget their problems. The wife can ask her husband about his problems and try to help solve them. If a woman corrected herself and changed the house according to his desires, then she could be hopeful that her husband could be drawn back to his family and that he would avoid corrupt places.
She should advise him and remind him of the grim consequences of his deeds.
She should even cry and beg him to give up his bad companions. She must say to him:. I am proud of you. I prefer you to all things and I am ready to devote myself to you. But I am saddened by one thing; why should a man, like you, have these kinds of friends; or attend that kind of a party?
Such deeds are not suitable for you.
Covenant marriage in comparative perspective / | University of Toronto Libraries
Please give them up". It is possible that the husband is used to unworthy habits and that he would not be influenced easily, but the wife should not become disappointed. She should pursue her goal with greater strength and patience. Women have great power and influence over men. She is able to do whatever she wills if she puts her mind to it. If a woman decides to save her husband from the filth of corruption, she can do it. There is an eighty per cent chance of success, provided she acts wisely.
Anyway, she must not use violence or a harsh attitude, unless she sees that there is not any result from being kind and gentle to him. Even then she must quarrel, leave home or use any other way in as kind a way as possible and not revengefully. Yes, looking after one's husband is the duty of every wife. It is a difficult duty and that is why the Prophet S of Islam stated: "The Jihad of a woman is to take care of her husband well. It is not wrong if a woman is watchful of her husband, but only if it does not exceed to a state of suspicion and mistrust. Suspicion is a destructive and incurable illness.
Unfortunately some women are affected by this disease. A woman of suspicion imagines that her husband is, lawfully or unlawfully, disloyal to her. She imagines that he is married to another woman or that he is going to marry her. She suspects him of having an affair with his secretary or another woman. She loses trust in him because he comes home late or he was seen talking to a woman.
If he helps a widow and her children, the wife may think that he has an interest in her, other than a charitable one. If any woman gives her husband a compliment, saying that he is handsome or well-mannered, she concludes that he is interested in that woman. Upon finding a strand of hair in his car, she thinks there is another woman in his life.
Such women with these thoughts and inconclusive proof gradually assume certainty regarding their husbands' unfaithfulness.
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They think about it every day and night. They also tell others, friends and foes about it, who, in the name of sympathy, reinforce the allegations and in turn tell the concerned women about other unfaithful men. Arguments and rows start to take shape. The woman begins to ignore the affairs of the house and the children and might even go to her parents. She would monitor him and search his pockets. She would read his letters and would explain any trivial matter as due to his unfaithfulness. With this attitude, she would make the family's life hard and turn the house into a burning hell in which she would also suffer.
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If her husband brought proof of his innocence, or swore that he had not been committing any thing wrong, or cried, she would not be satisfied. The reader has certainly come across such women, but it is useful to know of the following cases:. I am now certain that my husband is unfaithful to me.
A few days ago, I saw him with an attractive woman walking in the street. I read a weekly magazine which has a proper section on fortune telling.